Standards

I believe we all have standards, with family, friends, job and loves.  My friends tease me because they feel that my standards in a man are high.  I didn't realize that the love for Jesus, honesty, integrity and patience were taboo?!  I want to meet a man who loves the Lord and has a good heart.  It is possibly.  Integrity in a man is important, actually it is important for all of us to have integrity.  Though sometimes it feels like it is lost in some of the men I have met. I have made some mistakes that unfortunately, I do regret, but I go on.  Do I want to make the same mistakes?!  HELL NO!!!  I am learning and very quickly! This wide eyed woman is realizing that some men do not deserve to stand beside me, and I am not hesitating to move away anymore.  It is sad to see that grown men over fifty have learned nothing from their mistakes, and continue to make them with women they meet.  How sad.

I am not perfect by any means, but if I give 100% in a relationship, I want that 100% given back to me too.  Though right now, I just rather be alone and enjoy my time with family and good friends.  I realized the other day, I do not want to put any effort into a love relationship, I just want to be.  I have a dear friend who wants to be married again, I don't get that. I do pray for her, that God would send her a good man that would cherish her, because her ex husband did not.  Maybe, that is what I am afraid of, not being cherished.  I know how that feels, it cuts your very soul.  Believe me, I still admire an attractive man, at least what I find attractive.  And, unfortunately, I sometimes get let down because some of these men are douche bags.  I am not impressed with men who have a good wife and these "husbands" are atrocious!!  I wonder why these women stay with these men, then I realize, I did. 

Please understand I do support love and marriage, just not for me right now.  I am okay with being alone.  I know, that if God wants me to meet someone that will be the man that I need, He will make it known.  I will wait on God's choice for me, because I am not choosing well.  God will find that man who will get my oddities and be patient and kind with no reservations.  God will find that man who challenges me in my passions.  God will find that man who knows that he is accountable for his treatment on me, I don't think men realize that.  I know that when the Lord sends that man He has chosen for me, it will be by His standards, not mine.

"HELL NO!" Ingrid Michaelson